After her eviction from 'Bigg Boss', on New Year's Eve, Sunny Leone told DT she's never had to tell a man more than once to lay off, till she met Amar Upadhyay
How did you feel after the eviction?
It was bittersweet. Bitter because I couldn't make it to the finale as a contestant, and sweet because in the New Year, I'm going to be on the outside with friends and family and as part of normal life!
How are you going to bring in the New Year?
In my hotel room, having a nice hot shower, ordering room service, watching today's episode of "Bigg Boss" to see if my friends are crying for me, and having a glass of champagne at 12 o' clock.
So you're on your own?
Yeah, I'm on my own. None of my friends and family could make it because... it's not fair that they couldn't tell anybody till today, and mere friends and family America mein hain!
When you were evicted, did you feel betrayed or angry at someone?
I think that everybody in the house except for my two friends was either mean or didn't want me there or had issues and wasn't being straight to my face. But that's ok. Now that I'm out, I don't have anything to say except I'll call my friends and won't talk to anybody else!
Did you feel a difference in the reactions to you when you told everyone who you were?
I didn't really see a difference. I know that Juhi and Sky were very proud that I said what I said and that made me feel really good. But there wasn't much of a difference in the others. What was being said behind my back, I had no idea, and what they say can't hurt me today. Their opinions are their opinions.
Amar Upadhyay tried to get cozy with you, didn't he?
I tried to handle it in an adult manner, with conversations. I'm not sure he listened to the first one, so I told him again. The first one was when he kissed my hand - I told him you have wife, kids, I respect my husband, I respect him and you should show your family the respect they deserve. We should do our task in a way that's respectful to the whole family.
During the rain dance, I told him not to, but he picked me up. Your first reaction as a woman is... you don't know what to do, how to react. You're scared kyunki you're stuck within four walls with people you've just met. It's a very difficult situation because you don't know what's going to come out of anybody's mouth, and you've watched the show - you know what's said to women and how they talk. It's not nice. You avoid the situation and handle it with as much care as possible, unfortunately.
In your work, have you felt that men assume that you'd be loose or available because you're a pornstar?
It's the first time in my entire career that I've had to tell a man more than once not to be a certain way. That's why I didn't exactly know how to handle the situation as it was coming, other than talking to him as an adult. In my real life, no one comes near me or no one even tries to get fresh or do anything - it just doesn't happen. I might work in the adult industry, but where I come from, I get a lot of respect from men. I've worked with different people, different production companies, there are different men on the sets, and never have I felt this way. It happened, he (Amar) said sorry in front of the whole world, he said sorry two more times, and I can only assume he's sincere in his apology. I don't have to see him again, that's a different matter, I guess!
On the whole, since you've been to India and you know some people here - are people here more conservative, or do they have an attitude when they hear 'pornstar'?
I don't think it's an India thing, I think it's an everywhere thing. Whichever country you go to, the US, Europe, you're always going to face these issues where people want to judge and talk to you a certain way because of your background. All you can do is change people's opinions one person at a time.
As for Amar, it doesn't matter where he's from. It's got nothing to do with India. My father's Indian, my grandfather, my great-great grandfather, my brother's Indian. Every man I know is very nice and respectful. Amar didn't come across this way, and I'm sure he's sorry.
Are Indian prudes - that thing about 'we're Indians, we don't talk about sex'?
I think it's a conservative country. I'm not sure it's a 'suppressed' thing. I think that the younger generation is trying to step out of this. It's not about sexuality, it's about how you want to be presented, and being able to do that. It's like, mom and dad, I wanna do what I wanna do, and mom and dad should accept this.
Did you know about the cross-promotion issue, about an Indian organization asking Colors to stop you from using "Bigg Boss" to promote your videos on your site?
I wasn't aware, I don't know all the details, but I do know that if "Bigg Boss" came to my company and my partner to take care of something or to fix the situation, I know that we definitely wouldn't want to tarnish a hopefully ongoing relationship with "Bigg Boss" and all the companies involved. If there was an issue, I know that my company and partner would want to handle the situation correctly so that no one is hurt and it gets fixed.
But surely "Bigg Boss" will get you more fans and customers in India?
No matter what I do, which show I do in this country, my name is always going to be associated with who I am. No one can take that away. No matter what people do, you're always going to come back to who I am. You can't stop that train. Chandna Arora
How did you feel after the eviction?
It was bittersweet. Bitter because I couldn't make it to the finale as a contestant, and sweet because in the New Year, I'm going to be on the outside with friends and family and as part of normal life!
How are you going to bring in the New Year?
In my hotel room, having a nice hot shower, ordering room service, watching today's episode of "Bigg Boss" to see if my friends are crying for me, and having a glass of champagne at 12 o' clock.
So you're on your own?
Yeah, I'm on my own. None of my friends and family could make it because... it's not fair that they couldn't tell anybody till today, and mere friends and family America mein hain!
When you were evicted, did you feel betrayed or angry at someone?
I think that everybody in the house except for my two friends was either mean or didn't want me there or had issues and wasn't being straight to my face. But that's ok. Now that I'm out, I don't have anything to say except I'll call my friends and won't talk to anybody else!
Did you feel a difference in the reactions to you when you told everyone who you were?
I didn't really see a difference. I know that Juhi and Sky were very proud that I said what I said and that made me feel really good. But there wasn't much of a difference in the others. What was being said behind my back, I had no idea, and what they say can't hurt me today. Their opinions are their opinions.
Amar Upadhyay tried to get cozy with you, didn't he?
I tried to handle it in an adult manner, with conversations. I'm not sure he listened to the first one, so I told him again. The first one was when he kissed my hand - I told him you have wife, kids, I respect my husband, I respect him and you should show your family the respect they deserve. We should do our task in a way that's respectful to the whole family.
During the rain dance, I told him not to, but he picked me up. Your first reaction as a woman is... you don't know what to do, how to react. You're scared kyunki you're stuck within four walls with people you've just met. It's a very difficult situation because you don't know what's going to come out of anybody's mouth, and you've watched the show - you know what's said to women and how they talk. It's not nice. You avoid the situation and handle it with as much care as possible, unfortunately.
In your work, have you felt that men assume that you'd be loose or available because you're a pornstar?
It's the first time in my entire career that I've had to tell a man more than once not to be a certain way. That's why I didn't exactly know how to handle the situation as it was coming, other than talking to him as an adult. In my real life, no one comes near me or no one even tries to get fresh or do anything - it just doesn't happen. I might work in the adult industry, but where I come from, I get a lot of respect from men. I've worked with different people, different production companies, there are different men on the sets, and never have I felt this way. It happened, he (Amar) said sorry in front of the whole world, he said sorry two more times, and I can only assume he's sincere in his apology. I don't have to see him again, that's a different matter, I guess!
On the whole, since you've been to India and you know some people here - are people here more conservative, or do they have an attitude when they hear 'pornstar'?
I don't think it's an India thing, I think it's an everywhere thing. Whichever country you go to, the US, Europe, you're always going to face these issues where people want to judge and talk to you a certain way because of your background. All you can do is change people's opinions one person at a time.
As for Amar, it doesn't matter where he's from. It's got nothing to do with India. My father's Indian, my grandfather, my great-great grandfather, my brother's Indian. Every man I know is very nice and respectful. Amar didn't come across this way, and I'm sure he's sorry.
Are Indian prudes - that thing about 'we're Indians, we don't talk about sex'?
I think it's a conservative country. I'm not sure it's a 'suppressed' thing. I think that the younger generation is trying to step out of this. It's not about sexuality, it's about how you want to be presented, and being able to do that. It's like, mom and dad, I wanna do what I wanna do, and mom and dad should accept this.
Did you know about the cross-promotion issue, about an Indian organization asking Colors to stop you from using "Bigg Boss" to promote your videos on your site?
I wasn't aware, I don't know all the details, but I do know that if "Bigg Boss" came to my company and my partner to take care of something or to fix the situation, I know that we definitely wouldn't want to tarnish a hopefully ongoing relationship with "Bigg Boss" and all the companies involved. If there was an issue, I know that my company and partner would want to handle the situation correctly so that no one is hurt and it gets fixed.
But surely "Bigg Boss" will get you more fans and customers in India?
No matter what I do, which show I do in this country, my name is always going to be associated with who I am. No one can take that away. No matter what people do, you're always going to come back to who I am. You can't stop that train. Chandna Arora
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